Complicated - Stuck in the Middle

So tell me, why do have to go and make things so complicated????

Well things are pretty complicated now. A lot has been going on here around me and I have no idea how to deal with so many things happening at the same time. But all this are pretty deja vu - in the sense it kinda happen a year ago but with another group of friends...

And now, I'm stuck in the middle.. Just like the Mika's song!! :p

(watch this video, listen to the song, I love the song)



It's crazy enough that am pretty stressed out about transferring to UIU and completing the forms is just driving me mad.. Then this whole friends issue came into the picture. Then another personal issue attacked me! AIYKS!! 

This is just MADNESS!!!!!! 

~belle~

All Over Again

I remember I wrote a post like this before, and I'm doing it again.. I guess it's all a cycle - it happens over and over again.

Sometimes when you trust those people so much, yet they back stab you and betray you, you might wonder, who can I trust? I've been having issues with this and I've been struggling a lot about this too. Who can I really call a friend? Here's my definition:

A friend will always be there for you no matter what - yeah even when shit happens, they're still there
A friend will tell you what looks nice and good on you - and not just agree with everyone even when you look like shit!

There is also this category where you call them the school mate/college mate/university mate - they are just there for you to hang out, share gossips, share notes and lectures during the time when you're there. After that, *fly*, they go missing in action.

There is also this category - acquaintances - this is for those you meet at random parties and never bother to keep in touch.. Am sure we have a lot of them.

But for me, I have a bunch of really good friends and I really hope to maintain that way with them..

For instance, my Ipoh Buddies - Andrew Lee, Alan Lee, Derrick Chan, Brandon Wong, Chee Hau, Angel, Victoria Li Leng, Victoria Tien Tien, Siew Yen, Tze San - I really miss you guys a lot. You bunch of monkeys have been there for me a lot and I truly appreciate that. They were there since Ipoh (that's long.. :P)

Now in SEGi, I have a few really good ones like those - Jerome, Noah, Angelina, Jess. Do I have to mention how long they have to hear me yap about my past?? No need la.. We can skip that part.

See what I mean? Well to me, friends come and go. Only true friends stay. Am glad I found a few.

So you guys wanna attend my wedding??? :P (early invitation)

~belle~

Let bygones be bygones

Personally, I think, let bygones be bygones. There's no point clinging to the past. What's done is done - don't try to change anything about it. Even though no matter how much everyone of us would try to change, we can't change the past.

As I was speaking to friends of mine, everyone seems to regret what they could have done before this. But little do they know that because of the past, the current happen. Always take the past as your reference - make sure you don't make the same mistake again. I mean that's how I learn and that's how I grow more mature.. (yeah, that's why people call me aunty sometimes right??? :P)

But another thing to take note is that do not compare. For instance, you bought an old Nokia phone model; then you compare it with your iPhone - like DUH it's incomparable! Cause things will change. Even you'll get older day by day. So how could you compare one item to another? Even we humans, we can't compare ourselves to one another. Everyone is different. Probably there are things that this individual might remind you of your past - still, IT'S A DIFFERENT PERSON. So don't compare...

So, don't waste time anymore. Let bygones be bygones - look around you. You might realize there are people who actually cares a lot for you but all along you just didn't notice them. There are people who might be worried about you when you were worrying about something else. Don't just focus on your past. Look ahead of you - there's a better road ahead.

Don't look back in anger for the road not taken

~belle~

Close Your Eyes and Hope for A Better Tomorrow

Tomorrow, tomorrow,

I love you tomorrow,

You're always a day away.. 

Sometimes you wish things were different - so you don't have to argue almost every day. 
Sometimes you with he would change for you - because he promised he would. 
Sometimes you wish things were not that complicated - and you don't have to cry or worry to sleep every night.

Well, that's how I feel most of the time. Insecurity would always make a person feel scared and will influence him/her to think a lot - irrationally; though at times they might be rational. People always ask to be strong. Have faith. But how long can he/she withstand all the continuous arguments, disagreements, insecurity, the need to be there? How long does he/she has to wait?

Only the other half would know.

~bella~ 

Like Only A Woman Can

I wasn’t perfect
I’ve done a lot of stupid things
I’m still no angel
I wasn’t looking for forgiveness
Wasn’t laid out by my pride
Shocked by her attention
And someone signed me up for love
I didn’t want it
And now I can’t live without it

She changed my life
She cleaned me up
She found my heart
Like only a woman can
She pulls me up When she knows I’m sad
She knows her man
Like only a woman can

She’s kind of perfect
She’s kind of everything I’m not
Yeah, she’s an angel
And it’s amazing how she’s patient
Even more at times I’m not
She’s my conscience
And who decided I’d be hers
I wanna hate them
Cos now I can’t live without her

She changed my life
She cleaned me up
She found my heart
Like only a woman can
She pulls me up
When she knows I’m sad
She knows her man
Like only a woman can

Like only a woman can
And who decided I’d be hers
I wanna hate them
Cos now I can’t live without her

Oh, and she changed my life
She cleaned me up
She found my heart
Like only a woman can
She pulls me up
When she knows I’m sad
She knows her man
Like only a woman can

Like only a woman can
Like only a woman can
Like only a woman can

You have to admit, love is complicated. Sometimes you think it's not worth it to sacrifice so much. Well I guess it's complicated, like I've mentioned. 

THE PROCESS: 

1. You get to know that one person, and you like that person. So you start to get close to him/her.   
2. After a certain period of time, you realize things might work out. So obviously you would take more time and opportunity to know him/her - more up close and personal.  
3. When things are going so well, suddenly another individual comes into the picture. 
4. Then the guy/girl that you like realize:
1. He/She likes you more      OR
2. He/She likes the new individual and you're just a brother/sister. 

So wut's the end of story? The end of story is either the guy/girl will end up with you or you will lose the one you like/love/your bestie.

Man, this is how sad things might turn out to be for most people. But look at the bright side. Though sometimes things might not turn out the way you want them to, but something good awaits you. I strongly believe love happens when you least expect them (Yes, I'm serious about this).

If you've watched Valentine's Day, it's something like Ashton Kutcher and Jennifer Garner. Ashton really treated Jennifer as a good friend, and vice versa - Ashton got Jessica Alba; Jennifer got Patrick Dempsey. After they both were dumped by their other halves, they were really sad. But at the end, they realize in fact they have feelings for one another. Remember Ashton asked his assistant, "How come you and your wife go along so well?" and he answered, "Because I married my best friend." That's when Ashton realize that he has feelings for Jennifer.

Honestly, I personally experience that before. Haha, ended up realizing I fall in love with my bestie. Sometimes it work, sometimes it doesn't. So think twice about that also, or else you might end up losing a good friend. :D

Think twice, act smart.

~bella~